In your 30s, things that you would worry about it’s no more about why people “ghost” on you. But, now it’s more like, can I pay my debt and pay later later?
Admit it, nowadays not all people in their 30s have a steady job—the spike of start-up jobs where the company always broke and made people lose their day-to-day jobs. A covid situation where people get laid off and hard to find a job quickly. Even when people have 5 and 10 years already working jobs, the company pays them with a shitty paycheck.
Primarily, social media pressure is where we are “forced to” be consumptive. Then paylater and credit card happened.
The vicious cycle that makes us CAN’T EVEN AFFORD A DECENT HOUSE, A CAR, OR AN EMERGENCY FUND.
Why are we here? Despite the bubble of the economy that makes houses high up, the fact that we are young and have money that we don’t have and want to impress people that we are hate makes us reckless with money management.
Don’t let me start with people like me that need to provide a whole family. Paying my parent’s debt, helped my sister go to college, and my personal money problem.
What would I be? Of course, I’m one of the GEPREK GENERATIONS in this nation.
What is a Geprek Generation, you may ask?
My definition of Geprek Generation, like “Geprek” meaning itself-“smashed” or “crushed.” It’s similar to the sandwich generations, but I make it local.
The situation hardly makes people like me have a safety net but myself. We work harder than everyone. And whenever we want to enjoy our money, it’s hard not to think about selfishness and wasteful.
The finish line is always going further whenever I want to reach them.
It’s tiring, time-consuming, and hurts my confidence.
Speaking of jobs that give me money every month, I have my own story.
Since my early career, I have been working in a start-up company. For six years, everything seems okay. I got a good salary, love my jobs, and have the work-life balance I wanted.
Until Covid happened, during two years of Covid, I’ve been two times being laid off. First, because my company was running out of capital, and second because the company sucks. They don’t know what they are doing.
You know how it feels when you were being laid off on short notice without any compensation, still, have no job in the nearest time, and NO EMERGENCY FUNDS AT ALL?
IT’S A NERVE-WRACKING JOURNEY.
You want to die. Seriously.
So many debts, so little money you have.
It’s not like I’m so stupid managing my salary. But, because of the Geprek Generatios situation, where I can’t even save money. Can you imagine providing five people, including yourself? Not yet the debts that cost you 50% of your salary.
It’s hard, men. Don’t tell me otherwise.
And like what I said before, it’s affecting my confidence. If you are ever being laid off, you will be self-aware or have a hunch about when the company will sink or the time when your CEO will call you and say you no longer work in the company.
Whenever I do something terrible, I constantly get a nervous breakdown episode. I’ll have the scary scenario where I need to die, or I can’t give food on the table anymore. It’s hurt me because I love to work. I love to stay productive.
But, in the past two years, it seems like I always have a short run instead of a marathon.
Like what happened today, it’s only four months, and the first global company I work for decided to shut down. Luckily, I’ve been moved to the new project. But, trust me, it’s not that simple. I am saying goodbye to my team and starting something in the middle where everyone it’s rushing me. It’s very uneasy.
I want to have a stable life where I don’t need to open LinkedIn every three months to apply for jobs that I don’t even like.
I’m good at what I’m doing. I believe it. Heck, I even have 3 to 4 freelances to help me pay my debts.
It’s not fair if I have to work under the fear that I can lay off in the next few minutes because of one or two mistakes.
But, as we know, life is never fair since the beginning.
After a good crying and emotional eating, I said to myself. Why do I worry?
Can I survive this? OF COURSE, I CAN. I have no time to drown in sadness. I embrace the situation and I let that fucking nerve-wracking go.
Whatever will be, will be.
I believe that I can overcome this shitty situation as I did before. And my extrovert/Arian/sanguine ass myself would never….. give up easily.
Wish me luck!
ps: And for those of you who are in the same position, believe me, the universe always has a way to save you. Just believe in it.
The image of Ayam Gerprek as a context.